If you're a people pleaser like yours truly, the process of deciding who your bridesmaids/groomsmen will be might stress you out more than other aspects of the wedding planning process. Oftentimes, my couples have this same dilemma. Here are three questions to ask yourself before you officially decide on which besties will be standing by your side on your big day:

1. How many bridesmaids/groomsmen do I actually want in my wedding party? You need to know this number first and foremost. Do you want two bridesmaids? 10 bridesmaids? This number will definitely help get your brain in the right mindset.

2. Will (enter potential bridesmaid/groomsman name here) definitely play a large role in my life for the rest of my life? For me, this question was HUGE and really is what helped me finalize my list. I can’t count how many times I’ve talked to someone about their wedding and it has come up that they’ve lost touch with a couple of their wedding party members. Ask this question up front! These precious people will be in the photos you have framed in your home for the rest of your life.

3. Am I thinking of asking (insert name here) out of obligation, or do I genuinely want them in the party? Sometimes this question is a hard one to ask, but it’s completely necessary. MANY of my couples will process these verbally questions with me, and this tends to be the one that hits home the hardest. It’s definitely a reality check, but provides so much clarity when answered honestly.

Here is your sign to ask the people YOU want to be in your wedding party. It’s your special day, so be intentional and choosy! Let me lovingly remind you that when it comes to those who don’t “make the cut” - if they are true friends they will be so understanding and thrilled to celebrate with you as a guest. Choose the people you know will be the most supportive of you, thrilled for you, and with you for the rest of your lives. You won’t regret it!